0105; das leben fängt jetzt erst an

Endlich habe ich es wieder geschafft! 

Die Motivation diesen Blog weiter zuschreiben überkam mich vor einigen Tagen. Die Pause war nun wirklich lang genug und ich fühle mich schlecht deswegen. Durch Zufall habe ich mich an diesen Blog erinnert und als ich ihn mir ansah hat es mich wirklich glücklich gemacht. Nun möchte ich wirklich weiter schreiben. Einfach für mich. Nachvollziehen was ich so gemacht habe und was ich dabei gefühlt habe.

Mir ging es wirklich nicht gut. Viele verschiedene Gründe die mich bis ans Ende gebracht haben. Mir geht es besser. Nicht gut aber viel besser. Es hat sich einiges verändert. Das schmerzt und ist wunderschön (lol).

Ich habe meine Ausbildung zur dermatologischen Kosmetikerin und Wellnessberaterin letzten Herbst begonnen und es macht mir immer noch unglaublichen Spaß. Es war nie wirklich das, was ich machen wollte aber jetzt bin ich mehr als zufrieden, dass ich mir diesen Beruf ausgesucht habe. Als Zusatzausbildung habe ich im Februar ein Seminar zur Visagistin gemacht.

Meine gesamte Ausbildung mache ich an einer Kosmetik Fachschule in Essen. Das alles war mit großer Angst verbunden aufgrund meiner vorherigen Erfahrungen. Teils hat sich diese Angst bestätigt aber ich kann wirklich besser damit umgehen. Ich freue mich wirklich über diese wichtige Entscheidung.

Ich fühle das zum ersten mal in meinem Leben. Ich bin stolz. Es ist so ein schönes Gefühl 'etwas' zu können, das ist einfach unglaublich. Manchmal falle ich zurück in meine alten Gewohnheiten und das macht mir das ganze nicht gerade leicht, aber ich gebe weiterhin mein bestes und werde das zu 120% durchziehen!

Außerdem habe ich zwei wirklich unglaublich tolle Menschen kennen gelernt. Juli und Julia.

Beide habe ich im Internet über Dir en grey kennen gelernt hahahahaa

julia, ich, juli - im kyo hoodie ♥

a post i never finished... 

i still want to post it because it brings memories back. 

i will be running a new blog soon.

see you then!6

088; sweet sixteen

oh yes guys. finally i'm 16 years old. 8)))) ok not rly old but yea. sadly i just deleted all my pictures from my camera... D: i fucking hate myself for that ;;___;; but anyways it was rly lovely. here i will show you all the presents i got or bought for myself höhö. so here we go!

yeaaaaah finally i dyed my hair light pink. i wanted this like since 3984698213649823 million years and now finally i have it. i'm like so fucking happy ;__; it was easier than i thought! and my hair isn't even that dead. not worse than before. ;_; the first time in my life that i can say: i love my hair. ;_____;
aaaaand i got a belly button piercing!! like i fucking hate them. i think they are so gay but i dunno i just wanted one. :c my stepfather made it for me on my birthday on our sofa. XDD it was so weird and bloddy but alright. the reason why i got it is because my stepfather said he wouldn't make any other piercing.. and i thought ok it's for free so why not. XDD

k-on 01 . chobits 02 . no longer human . deadman wonderland 02

gta 4 . sims 3 . resident evil 5

gina tricot 10 euro

gina tricot 10 euro

monki 7 euro (bought from tiina)

primark - bag 10 euro . umbrella 5 euro

crazy factory - 6mm, 8mm, 10mm, 12mm - each under 1 euro

here are all the things i bought in the last time ;__; i love everything of it. the manga are just perfect and omg the gaaaammmeeesssss ;_____; the bestebettsbbebtsbtstbs ♥

066; forever lazyfish

well ok for a long time now i haven't done anything. i've been just in my bed whole day... watching some anime and getting really fat :)) sounds lovely, doesn't it? so well yeah i'm going to talk about my lazyfish weeks now...

it's just that since one week i have the best job in this world 8D i can just do whatever i want... for example nothing at all ♥

but yes i bought some stuff in the last weeks/months which i didn't show yet!

i got these pretty candles today ;_; they're from ikea.

.....already longer time ago that i bought that XD hm in fact it's just hair contitioner, hair water (dunno if that makes sense in english... i didn't even know it in german before 8D), night conditioner, hairspray, some hair stuff for after shower and some face creme. i must say i really love all of these products ;_; they're from alverde, balea and got2b. as you can see in fact,,, why am i saying this

oh well i guess i bought this here in december? XDDD a new make up from the body shop. it was quiet expensive D: 18euro if i remember right ... the make up i used before (can't even remember which) was around 10 euro i think... D: i don't like the smell of it that much... but actually it's very nice!

that banana shampoo, i dunno i thought it would be cool. but wtf. i srsly hate the smell and it isn't even so cool :c

oh well my kitty pullover i bought already months ago but never showed it here! i really really love it ;_; it's my favorite forever. it fits so well to my kitty bag ♥

and yeah a kitty brush cup and a kitty rubbish bin ... i'm so in love with kitties. i think that will never change XD

that tunnel i bought today. i payed 10 euro for that D: i could get it so much cheaper if i would order... but i dunno i didn't want to wait anymore... i was so bored of my other plugs :c

i really like this one♥

here is a .. random ... no-make-up picture with my little sister....

my sidecut is looking like a black hole in my head XD but yeah that's how i look like the last weeks. pretty clothes, cool hairstyle or makeup would be just a waste in this kind of days 8)

today i was really bored and so i started doing make up. but i just couldn't do it as well as i wanted :c i ended up removing one full side because it looked horrible. and now i can show the with and without make up effect. 8DDD

my eyebrow is looking so horrible in this photo XD ok irl it isn't pretty but doesn't look so.... reatarted like in this picture... 

i dunno i think this picture is funny just half retarded ;D

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oh well tomorrow i'm going to tinka's birthday party. so i think i will write soon again and won't be such a lazyass anymore 8)

ok i will stay like this forever.

031

this is what my ears are looking like atm.

sorry for the bad photos. D:

as you see i started to stretch my other ear today. i think it will look better than just one plug. D:

so now i have this 14mm plug and 6 other earpiercings. two of them were selfmade. D: and yes in the future there will be more shit herping around.

nobody is even going to read this but well yes.

026; my new plugs

Already a few weeks ago I ordered these plugs with Vivien.

Seriously, aren't they fucking pretty? ;_; I love them so much. So much glitter.

I just forgot to order something which fits to red clothes. But atm idgaf because they make me so happy.... ;___;

(the pictures of the other plug failed too hard,,, but it's also really pretty)

And finally I have 14mm. Now I'm thinking about stretching my other ear also. But yeah I'm not sure yet.

Looks like next year I will meet Yuki again in Amsterdam. In March it will be this time. I should ask my daddy about that soon. D: But I'm really happy because we're planning to meet Shelly from Austria also there. ♥